Review: The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies

Once again, the call of Middle-Earth has brought me creeping back to civilization from my abode in the fetid wildlands. The last installment of the Hobbit trilogy is upon us, and I would not miss it for all the gold in Erebor.

Azog the Defiler commands an army of Orcs in The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five ArmiesMmm, that’s a nerdy reference.

In the end, it was not the spectacular that the Lord of the Rings films were, but I couldn’t rightly call it a disappointment.

Smoke on the water:

Whereas the Desolation of Smaug was fairly plodding, the Battle of the Five Armies hits the ground running and never slows its pace, picking up immediately after the previous movie with Smaug raining destruction on Laketown.

While his role is relatively small this time around, I was once again blown away by how pitch-perfect Smaug is in these films. Every about his visuals and voice-overs is absolutely stellar.

Dragons are so overexposed in the fantasy genre that they’ve become a little blase, but Smaug reminds me of why we all loved dragons. Done properly, they are both majestic and terrible, and Smaug embodies that perfectly.

The Necromancer reveals himself in The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five ArmiesShortly afterward, the audience is treated to the White Council’s confrontation with the Necromancer of Mirkwood, Sauron in truth, at Dol Guldur.

This is a scene that I will point to for years to come as an example of why I love the fantasy genre. It is a clash of powers beyond mortal comprehension, and a triumph of the cinematic art. The Nazgul are more frightening than ever, and Galadriel’s power is both awesome and terrible.

The rest of the movie can’t really hold up to the mind-blowing majesty of these early scenes, but it still proves an enjoyable ride.

I will have war:

The Battle of the Five Armies is pretty much a non-stop action sequence. If the last film was a little too sluggish and bogged down in unnecessary details, then Five Armies can feel a little thin with its endless battles and unending procession of fantastic monsters.

Still, this isn’t Michael Bay does Middle-Earth. There’s still enough character and feeling to keep things from feeling completely mindless.

Thranduil and Gandalf in The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five ArmiesI am forced to conclude that splitting the book into three movies was probably a mistake. Two movies would have been fine, I think, but three did stretch it out a little too much.

Still, I wouldn’t call this a crippling flaw, and for what it’s worth, Desolation of Smaug suffered from the stretching a lot more than Five Armies did. But I do think the last two movies would have been a bit more satisfying if they had been combined to create a balance between character, backstory, and action.

I have a few other minor issues with the movie, too. One is that Thorin’s descent into madness is a little over-the-top. They made it too surreal, too sudden, and a little too hammy, and it cheapened the message of the story — that greed corrupts.

My one other issue is that I would have liked a little more tie-in to Lord of the Rings near the end. Sauron more or less vanishes from the story after his defeat at Dol Guldur.

This is accurate to the book, as the battle with the Necromancer was little more than a footnote in The Hobbit, but since they were already adding in the stuff from the appendices and Lord of the Rings, I don’t see why they couldn’t have slipped a little nod in. Maybe we could see Saruman peering into the Palantir and confronting Sauron for the first time.

A map of Middle EarthIt’s just a little jarring to have this unbelievably epic battle between him and the White Council at the beginning, only to have that entire story arc vanish thereafter.

On the other hand, there’s a tremendous amount of subtle detail in Five Armies that I truly enjoyed. Things like the beautiful discipline of an Elven army, the boisterous courage of the Dwarves, and the scrappy tenacity of the people of Laketown. The Elven king mourning the immortal lives lost under his command, and little nods to the greater mythology, such as Galadriel calling Sauron, “Servant of Morgoth.”

More so than in all the past movies — perhaps even the Lord of the Rings trilogy — Five Armies is a film where Middle-Earth and all of its rich cultures are brought to life in wondrous detail, and for a fan like me, that’s just wonderful.

Overall rating: 8.9/10

Review: The Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug + New Article

As regular readers of this blog may know, it’s very difficult for me to see movies in the theaters these days. There aren’t many theaters in the inflamed sphincter of nowhere, where I currently dwell. But there is only one force in this world that could keep me from seeing a Hobbit movie in the theaters. Know what that is?

Death.

Bilbo faces Smaug in the Desolation of SmaugThe Grim Reaper hasn’t gotten his grubby little mitts on me yet, so I had to form plans for a brief trip down to civilization to see the second installment of the trilogy, Desolation of Smaug.

I’ve now returned from my excursion to bring you my thoughts on the film.

How to milk your dragon:

I’m going to have to be honest: I was a little underwhelmed by this movie. Not to say it was bad by any stretch of the imagination, but it wasn’t the mind-blowing experience I’ve come to expect from Peter Jackson.

This movie takes a bit more liberties with the stories of the books, adding in more detailed depictions of Gandalf’s struggle against the necromancer of Mirkwood as well as new subplots dealing with the Elves of Mirkwood.

I think fleshing out the necromancer story was a good move. It has great significance to the greater story of Middle-Earth, and made for some very gripping moments.

A map of Middle EarthThe Elven story, though, did feel like little more than a shameless attempt to pad the story out to three movies.

It’s not even that it’s a bad story. It does a very good job of illustrating both the positive and negative sides of Elves in Tolkien’s mythos. They are very wise and noble, but also cold and indifferent to the world around them.

And more Elves is never a bad thing.

But this was already such a complicated movie. The original book was an epic, and the extra details added to flesh things out have only added to its complexity. In Desolation of Smaug, it reaches a critical mass where there’s just so much going on that none of the plots end up getting the time or attention they deserve, and the film loses a lot of emotional weight as a result. It jumps around so much that it’s hard to get invested in each story.

It’s like when you’re cooking and you add one too many spices to a dish. There’s nothing wrong with that particular spice — it might be delicious in another dish — but you’ve muddled the flavour so much you can’t appreciate each individual component.

Smaug the Stupendous:

Artwork of Smaug the StupendousBut this movie still has a lot going for it, and chief on that list is Smaug himself.

As sort of the original fantasy Dragon from which the modern interpretation of the archetype springs, Smaug is a character with a lot of weight and importance even beyond his role in the story of “The Hobbit.” It was very important that they get him right.

They got him right.

I couldn’t have asked for a better portrayal of Smaug. He’s a masterpiece of special effects technology, massive and terrifying yet still very real-feeling. His fire-breathing assaults are spectacular, but what’s perhaps most impressive is how expressive they were able to make his face. Getting a giant, ugly lizard to display emotion is no easy task, but they pulled it off very well.

I was also quite pleased with his voice-overs. It’s hard not to get a feeling of, “Oh, look, Benedict Cumberbatch again,” even as someone who hasn’t seen most of what he’s been in, but you can’t argue with the results. He does perfectly capture Smaug’s majesty, and his madness.

There were some other highlights to the movie, as well. Everything to do with Gandalf and the necromancer was as good as I could have hoped for. The plot is full of creeping dread, and it concludes with a truly spectacular confrontation.

The action sequences in general are as fun as one would expect. I was particularly fond of the scene in which the Dwarves escape Mirkwood in wine barrels. It’s one of the most absurd yet entertaining fight scenes I’ve ever had the pleasure to witness.

The titular dragon of The Hobbit: Desolation of SmaugAll in all, Desolation of Smaug is a pretty good movie. It’s just not as good as I’ve come to expect from Peter Jackson’s previous journeys through Middle-Earth.

Overall rating: 8.1/10

New article:

My latest contribution to WhatMMO is Combining MMO Classes. In case it isn’t obvious by now, I’m a bit bored with a standard class archetypes. But come on, rogues and necromancers belong together like peanut butter and chocolate!