Well, it finally happened. After six years away (discounting brief flirtations with the free version), I have returned to World of Warcraft in anticipation of the Worldsoul Saga. As of this writing, I’ve barely set foot in the Dragon Isles, so I have no cogent thoughts on the current expansion. Instead, I want to talk about something much more… philosophical.

Mai’s hair is going grey.

As I considered this return, I was struck by how long this game has been around, and how long I’ve been playing it. I was a teenager when I created Mai. I’m thirty-three now. And I started thinking about the passage of time in-universe as well as in the real world.

Really I suppose this started with the War Within cinematic trailer. Anduin was a child when this game started. He’s a grizzled adult now. Thrall was barely an adult when we met him in Warcraft III. Now he’s a middle-aged father with a salt-and-pepper beard.

And Mai? I pictured her as in her early to mid twenties when I started playing her, which means she must be in at least in her mid-forties now, and she’s had a hard life. The years must be taking their toll. Hence my changing her hair.

As I’ve said many times, I never really got into role-playing with other people, but the histories and stories I make up about my characters in WoW have always been important to me. I haven’t put so much thought into these things in recent games — my New World characters have only the slimmest of concepts behind them. I think it’s a combination of the fact I was a lot younger and less depressed when I started WoW, combined with the — to be brutally honest — tedious nature of its gameplay. This game gives you a lot of time to let your mind wander as you play, so why not tell yourself some stories?

Thinking about Mai getting older makes me feel some surprisingly strong emotions, though I’d be hard-pressed to name them. I remember her as a bright, patriotic young soldier who got recruited out of basic training by Stormwind Intelligence. But that was a long time ago now. Now she’d be staring down middle age. I can’t imagine she had time for marriage or family. She’s likely the last of her line. How does she feel about that?

And Mai wouldn’t be the only one of my characters feeling the weight of years grow heavy. My shaman was old when I made him. Likely he’d have died of old age now. I could never bring myself to delete him, but I’m not sure I’ll play him again. The old man deserves his rest.

My paladin is no spring chicken, either. In her current incarnation, she’s a veteran of the Second War. She’d probably still be alive — probably — but I doubt she’d be in fighting shape these days.

Shaman and paladin, at least, are classes I wouldn’t mind rerolling. I always wanted a Blood Elf paladin; my current one is only human for the sake of a guild I haven’t talked to in years. I’m also weighing the possibility of creating a shaman with the new (to me) Dark Iron Dwarf allied race. I like the cut of their jib.

Time is little concern to my many and sundry Elf characters — two or three decades isn’t much to the likes of them — but that doesn’t mean they might not retire for other reasons.

My warlock’s story was always about defeating the Burning Legion, and she did that. Part of me is keen to keep playing the character, for both role-play and gameplay reasons, but part of me likes the idea of letting her retire to Quel’thalas so she can finally start to heal her many hurts. If anyone deserves it, she does.

I’m not sure how much of this will be relevant. I don’t know how much I can restrain my alt addiction, but I do want to at least try to treat WoW more casually this time. I’m not done with New World by any means, and there’s only so many hours in the day. That might mean that I only play one or two characters.

Mai will keep fighting until she can’t, but the rest of the roster has a more uncertain future. Maybe more of the old cast will return, or maybe it’s time for a new generation of heroes to rise.

I’m not sure what point I’m trying to make here, except I guess that this game is making me face my own mortality in some truly strange ways.